The Return of Friday!

He does, in fact, like Count Chocula, but any similarities in his hairstyle are strictly coincidental.

He traded his neck and nostrils for extra eyes.

“I was thinking I might try to grow sideburns.”

“Stop throwing hot onion rings at it”, he pleaded. “I prefer donuts.”

Never sure if it’s swimming forward or backward.

…or
Not even the full moon can transform this movie into something decent

Last night I saw a screening of “The Wolfman” movie which is due to be released today, February 12th. If this review serves as anything to you, dear reader, let it be a warning: Director Joe Johnston and company have shit the bed quite horribly with this latest attempt at reviving an old Universal horror franchise, with a film awash in poor acting, plot anemic storytelling and wretchedly awful special effects. I find it rather pointless to go into the specifics of why this movie is so completely terrible, but it must be noted that there were chuckles during various ‘intense’ or ‘moving’ moments, scoffing during obviously poor computer-driven special effects (‘special’ in the way that those Olympics for challenged children are special), and more than it’s share of audience watch-checking. Trust me, folks–this thing is b-a-d. Even Anthony Hopkins, usually at very least decent, is clearly phoning his performance in, evidently from somewhere deep within the Bermuda Triangle. Benicio Del Toro is monstrously miscast (pun intended), and poor Emily Blunt spends the movie looking slightly constipated. The sets are pretty nice, and there are a few visuals that are almost kind of sort of nice, but the overall effect of the film on myself and those with me for this particular screening was, “You guys want to go get a pizza or something? Too late to eat? Yeah, I guess. See you guys next week maybe. Oh, did you remember to call Kim? Yeah, I told her about that Hollywood Bowl event and she….yeah, yeah. Did she really? Weird. Well, we can catch up later in the week. Drive safe…”

In other words, it had absolutely no effect on anyone.

So, if you are up for a film that:

a. uses very, very loud noises to ‘scare’ you (inevitably resulting in the source of the sound being some innocuous something-or-other)….

b. utilizes the lamest motion-blurring, camera-shaking, fuzzy-ghost computer graphics….

c. allows it’s performers to sleepwalk through a horrendously un-dramatic script (amongst pretty sets)….

d. has a guy with a lot of hair and the cutest little black doggie nose….

….then ‘wolfman’ is for you! Otherwise, steer the hell clear of this wolf-poop-pile of a movie.

“I can scratch that for you.”

He’s standing straight. The floor is slanted.

Annie looked a little different, coming home after the PTA meeting that night.

“I got the tattoo when I was young and stupid. Don’t make fun.”

“Today, I’d like to talk to you about the power of positive thinking.”

“There better not be raisins in them cookies.”